Todo y Nada

Todo-Nada

Here is the coin carried by John of the Cross.
On one side: todo – everything – the gift.
On the other: nada – nothing – vacant space.
He fingered this penny every day,
touched the gift of God’s impinging love,
caressing the pain and suffering of empty space.
Well worn, this copper piece,
calluses on both thumb and forefinger.

John was in touch with the mystery,
the paradox of everything and nothing,
of life coming through Jesus
and a dying unto oneself.

(Bishop Robert Morneau, auxiliary bishop
of Green Bay, Wisconsin, America, April 5, 2010)

This brief poem describes the paradox of St. John of the Cross’ mantra, “todo y nada” as an imaginary coin that we all carry. And knowing that alone is precious. It is as close as our hands.

The gift – side of the coin is the gratuity of life itself, but more, the Giver of life, who desires a friendship with each one of us – God. The vacant space – side is our spiritual poverty, our restless souls, our human emptiness that we can also occasionally glimpse and feel.

St. John of the Cross “fingered” this coin, felt its presence – todo y nada – all and nothing – every day. He plumbed a profound spiritual life and worked with St. Teresa of Avila in renewing the Carmelite order at great personal cost in 16th century Spain. He was imprisoned by his own order and given bread and water to drink. He imposed strict mortifications of the flesh on himself as well – throughout his priesthood.

His “dark night of the soul,” forged his poetry, describing the soul’s relationship with God in his three major poems and commentaries: The Ascent of Mt. Carmel-The Dark Night; The Spiritual Canticle; The Living Flame of Love. These inspired poems and commentaries earn him the name, the “Mystical Doctor.”

This copper coin, the double dimension of divine gift and human vacancy, caused calluses on his digits. Morneau’s poem moves from the coin itself to John’s thumb and forefinger, opposing digits, which work together in unison, a primate evolution, and mimic the dialectic of the gift – vacancy in the human soul. Calluses assure us that this daily work of the spirit is a tiresome, but necessary, labor indeed.

The interplay of God – human soul is a mystery with which everyone must wrestle – especially the Christian who claims to follow Jesus. For the great gift of eternal, abiding life we proclaim in His resurrection is accessible only by our surrender, our death – to – our – way – of – doing – things. And that is hard for any adult – especially in 21st century America, so confident in our autonomy and gadgetry.

Eternal life, beginning now, in faith, is everything. To access that life means I have to reduce to nothing and die to my willfulness this day and everyday – and get calluses on my fingers, like John. Faith in Christ, surrender to Him and His Way, remains our primary work.
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